I once went on a date with Arvin Jimenez. That probably doesn’t register as significant, so let me rephrase that. I once went on a date with Tado.

At the time, which was almost a decade ago, he was known as that funny guy on Strangebrew, with a band called Big Time Tado (Big TT for short).

The thing is, I was a last-minute substitute for a contest winner who had better things to do than claim her prize, which was a date with Tado.

We ate at a restaurant which was not exactly fancy, but also not somewhere you'd go without your parents, unless you're employed.

We had vegetarian pizza, and Tado prodded at his black olives with a fork, asking me why there was barbula on the pizza.

(I remember that night fondly because it increased my vocabulary by one word – barbula, as it was explained to me, is the rubber fitting used in faucets.)

Later in the evening, the “date” was aired over the radio, and Tado, asked by the DJ if I was pretty, said “Hmm... maputi siya.”
This happened maybe eight years ago, and though I had told the story a number of times to get a few laughs from people, I had pretty much forgotten about it until this week.

You know how some people say "maputi lang" when asked if someone is only good-looking?

I'd wondered about that before. If to be fair-skinned is a "lang," then what's with all the whitening products?

Researching about the dangers of skin whitening, I came across several online debates about wanting fairer skin.

The best cases both for and against, in my opinion, were, in simple terms, "don't mess with nature" and “don't judge other people for what they think is beautiful.”

Also, isn't wanting to be beautiful natural, too?

I once said I didn't understand what the obsession was with whitening, at a time when soap with one whitening ingredient or another was the rule and not the exception.

Buying soap was surprisingly difficult, because almost everything featured vitamins, minerals, and always, always Plus! New! Whitening Formula!

(My favorite is sandalwood soap, less than thirty pesos, doesn't disappear quickly, lathers well, but yes my fascination with soap is beside the point.)

It was frustrating for me, because I didn't want any whitening ingredients in my soap.

Not because I didn't want to become whiter, worse things could happen, but I didn't like the idea of putting chemicals on my skin. (As an anticipatory measure for what a number of people (Hi, Pa!) are likely to say re: chemicals, I think I should qualify this doesn't translate to an aversion to chemicals inside the body.)

Before I get lost in a maze of parentheses and other topics, "It's easy for you to say, you're already fair," was what someone told me.

Which got me thinking, would I mind if I were darker? The answer is yes, but only because it wouldn't be as easy to spot dirt on my skin. (OCD will be discussed in a future entry.)

My sister, when she was born, had skin so much like porcelain you could see the bluish green veins.

She was also sickly and had a large head so that one day she leaned over her crib and promptly toppled over. She turned out better than alright, being our overachiever. End of digression.

My mama said she felt like people who'd see her carrying my sister must think she was a nanny.

Mama is dark-skinned. The point there, though, was not that she wanted to be fairer-skinned. Just that my sister didn't take after her.

Last summer, we went to Sariaya, Quezon for a few days.

Courting disaster, I walked along the shoreline every day we were there, without sunblock, As a result, I came home with sand in my pockets and a tanline to beat all tanlines. I had burn lines.

My skin was literally black. I never quite recovered since, but I'm happily brown.

There was a time I was happily orange from eating too many carrots, but that's a different story.

Before this research, I didn't know much about the stuff they put in whitening products, except that it's best to stick with the simpler cleaning agents.

My lola had always told me that soap and water is all you need, and I believed her.

Now that I know what they really put in there, I'm really glad we weren't brought up using this and that lotion or cream.

A lot of formulas have a cocktail of chemicals in them, and some, like hydroquinone, can have pretty painful side-effects. It's like cigarettes. (May or may not be discussed in the future.)

While I'm tempted to say don't mess with what you have, we all have our own preferences.

A comment on this article predicts that soon, people will be dyeing their skin different colors.

I guess that's sort of what tattoos are.

Maybe the point is simply wanting to do things to your body, experimenting, seeing what floats your boat.

Although that probably applies more to hair styles and tattoos and body piercing than wanting your skin to be a different color.

(Insert endless debate on racial and cultural issues)

I'm inclined to just let people alone.

I'd say let them do what they want, as long as they're well-informed.

As the Wiccan Rede goes, an' it harm none, do what ye will.